RESTART

i wish i could depress the RESTART button and everything goes back to the beginning..

this is not as easy as i think it would be.. Honestly i think trusting God would have been an easier choice.. But the decision have been made..

Why did i do wat i did.. Being in a vicious cycle of troubles and trials really made me very tired out over this few years.. One problem not settle, another come to haunt me.. "All things work for the good" sadly doesn't apply in my life.. Say i'm without determination, call me immature i dun care.. I need to step out of the cycle and see things in a rational perspective.. I want to try something different, since wat i have been doing dun seem to work, Why not.. I need the breakthrough bcoz the weight of the family is on my shoulders, and i cant be insane to do the same thing over and over and expect a different result..

Work sucks seriously.. I love the career but i hate the job.. It really sucks life out of me and i need a break from all the routine.. Routines that i do wkly just bcoz it is only right to be doing them bcoz of who i am and wat i believe.. I need to find that original purpose of doing it.. Thus i promise myself never to be a hypocrite.. Never do it unless i am fully convinced of it's purpose again..

I'm sorry to those who believed, and those who look up to me for what i believed.. The soldier need time and needs a clear mind, a new sense of purpose before he can fight again.. I apologise for those whom i've hurt in the process of making this decision.. If you still have trust for me, trust me..